Every day I show up to participate in this life!

Yesterday morning I hit the garage door opener while whizzing out the door and almost broke my neck trying to whirl back around to punch it again while walking at full stride. I think I threw out my right shoulder.

Nothing!

I punch it again – again nothing. Slight problem here because my truck is inside the garage and while not impossible it would be rather difficult to get it out through a closed garage door.

Do any of you with garages know how to get out if the opener fails?

First I get the remote opener out of my truck and hit that button in case the problem is with the unit on the wall or the wiring running to the main mechanism. Then I grab the stool and unplug then plug back in the opener – the plug is in the ceiling. Oops, rather I grabbed the stool, took off my heels, climbed up on said stool, unplugged, plugged back in, stepped off stool onto frozen concrete, hopped around trying to get shoes back on while saying “cold, cold, cold, cold”. Um – yeah yesterday was our first cold day and I the temperature was around freezing which would make the concrete - ummmmm - around freezing.

Go back and hit opener – nothing - Damn!

Walk over to garage door, grab release and pull. Yanked with too much enthusiasm and cracked a nail – double Damn! Slide door up and have to quickly grab door stop it from slamming back down because of g-force exerted when sliding it up.

Get in truck, start truck, back truck out of garage. Turn truck off because key to front door is on truck keychain and you actually broke nail #2 trying to removing house key from keychain.

Utter curse words rather loudly. Look around to ensure neighbors aren’t outside and didn’t hear you.

Walk back in garage, shut garage door, and reengage release. Pull on door to make sure release engaged – slightly lift nail #3 this time because hand slipped and hit nail when aggressively yanking on metal garage door. Good thing these things are fake!

Utter more curse words quietly this time then realize you don’t have to worry about neighbors because you are inside.

Go into house, set alarm, sprint to front door twisting ankle while frozen foot malfunctions and falls off heel on the way. Lock front door with the key. Limp to truck whispering “ouch, ouch, ouch” with each step. Get in truck restart and sit in running truck for a few minutes because it is freezing outside and you are afraid the bad karma following you will make truck shoot piston rod through hood while exiting driveway. That could put an eye out you know.

It is like running with scissors.

Truck half-way warm so you take off for drive into workplace. Antics in garage have caused you to leave later than normal which puts you into heavier traffic so highway resembles parking lot. Bypass highway and cut through town encountering many, many stoplights and idiots on way.

Pass Tu Hai and salivate over possibility of spring rolls – damn – they don’t open until 9 am. – drive rest of way to work with stomach growling profusely spitting accumulated saliva out window because these spring rolls are just that good. Hope you didn't string saliva spit down side of truck.

Arrive at work 18 minutes late whisper silent prayer because boss’ vehicle isn’t in parking lot. Limp across parking lot from earlier sprained ankle, slink into building, slide into your seat, log into computer and look busy.

Notice message light on phone check message and find out that resume submitted 2 days earlier has netted a phone interview. Decide the Gods are smiling on you after all and it is going to be a great day!

Sorry bleaders but life and work has just been E’s and A’s lately so I haven’t had much time to play with ya’ll and it doesn’t look like it is going to let up anytime soon.